I Just Don't See It

After about 3 days of a cold, or illness, or whatever it is that has invaded my body, I get pretty tired of it all. I can find myself getting cranky, the physical part affecting the emotional part. I get tired of the lack of energy and motivation illness brings. This all leads to struggling with accepting the fact that I'm sick, not wanting to slow down, not wanting to give in. Stupidity or pride, who's to say, but I just don't want to admit that I'm not up to par.

I suppose what I'm talking about is acceptance. In this case, acceptance that I need to slow down and take care of myself, to be a little selfish right now, is what is good and  what I need. In the bigger picture, acceptance plays a major role in many of our issues, not just the physical. We have our perceptions of what life should be and how those close to us, or even those not so close, ought to act. Unfortunately, perceptions are not reality, and acceptance must deal with reality.

When we accept life on life's terms, we step into that life of living in reality. Escaping from reality is a common reaction, which can lead to dysfunctional habits, keeping us planted in the "would of, should of, and could of", looking like the ostrich who sticks his head in the sand of denial. Accepting life on its terms is easy yet hard, as accepting doesn't mean that the reality of life will change to make us comfortable. Acceptance is more like confronting ourselves, our fears, our need for control, and being assertive in what we can change and understanding what is beyond our change.

I recently read a passage from a book entitled "Easy Does It", describing acceptance in the following way, "When we accept something, we are not passively taking it in. We are ready to work through and toward our new awareness. But we can't do anything at all unless we accept it as a reality." Acceptance becomes a time in life where we stop running from our issues and run straight into them, facing them, owning what is ours, being responsible for our own change, and letting go of what is not ours to hold on to any longer. We stop our defensive posturing, trying to prove its cause is outside ourselves, stop the excuses, and accept what we must accept, to live in reality.

My friend and reader, acceptance is not passive, but based in reality and truth. Acceptance is an active process that provides personal understanding and promotes greater personal growth. I encourage you today to begin to explore what you struggle accepting in life. Be real, in the here and now, and discover the beginning steps you need to take to work towards accepting your role, what you can change, what you desire, all based in the reality of your life. Accepting is not weakness, rather strength, and results in freedom.


(The writings in this post are random thoughts and observations and are NEVER intended as professional or personal advice. Take what works and leave the rest. For information on mental health and/or substance abuse help, visit http://www.rodneyvalandra.com and refer to the links page.)